24th Feb Warm

Haven't been posting for a long time, and some are already bitching at me to start, heh. I don't post VERY interesting posts, but I guess I have some long overdue ones to share.

Year 2010, I seem to have quite some interesting bunch of students, here are some to share.

1. Theres this guy, who spam my biscuits all the time, and after gorging himself full with the biscuits... he would SLAP his tummy and heave sighs of content!! Imagine THAT !

2. Then theres this girl, who are just as crazy about animes and mangas as I used to, or rather, a bunch of them who idolize MJ!! And yet about 2 years ago, I thought my kind was an extinct one. Now you see them sprouting out from nowhere.

3. Following the cartoon "Bananas in Pajamas" which has B1 and B2, I have a cute girl who makes me G2 and shes G1.

4. Then there's this girl, whom I just can't resist.......... throwing paper balls at her!

5. Following Arun, theres now another guy who is even taller than him, 1.93m ! I know who to ask to change my room's lightbulb now.

6. A little chilli girl who always bullies me in lessons, although I admit I simply love to piss her off sometimes, but we do get good laughs! (sounds like you, Jocelyn Sim!)

7. Gabryel from St. Gabriel, I'm still waiting for a Teck Ghee from Deyi, Anderson from Anderson, or maybe Nicholas from St. Nicholas, which is IMPOSSIBLE

8. A little girl, who loves to wear oversize stuffs on her, specs, watches etc!


And the list goes on, I have wonderful and interesting students, I guess I'm gonna have a good year ahead of me! I guess I'm blessed (fingers crossed).


DDOJ:

A secondary school teacher arrived late for class to find a most uncomplimentary drawing of himself on the whiteboard. Fuming, he asked the class, “Who is responsible for this atrocity?!”

The class clown won tremendous prestige among his peers by answering, “I really don’t know, but I strongly suspect his parents.”

Adios!

19th Jan Rainy

Haven't had this big rain for a long time, tonight's big time raining was pretty refreshing. Just kinda realized, with the rain hitting on the roof of my car, that I'm gonna go through the same old shit with the new batches. Going through double entry, blah blah blah and what have you...

Went out to grab supper for my sister, and saw one of my old time buddy. I would have to say I was pretty surprise, not with the sudden met up, but more about the strange handshake. Seems so unnatural to me, almost like strangers. I guess we really haven't been talking for a damn long time. I almost didn't realize it was THAT long already. We even have the same birthday.

Anyway, friend of mine came back from Japan, and of all presents, he gave me a pretty entertaining monkey doll that laughs! He can tumble and roll, and has this pretty damn funny laughter, I swear it even sounds like my friend. I'll be sure to introduce you all the monkey next time, batteries already loaded!


DDOJ:

Doctor Bob had sex with one of his patients and had felt guilty all day long.

No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming.

Every once in a while, however, he'd hear that soothing voice, within himself, trying to reassure him: "Bob, don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with one of their patients, and you won't be the last. And you're single. Let it go."

But invariably another voice would bring him back to reality: "Bob, you're a veterinarian!"

Adios!

14th Jan Happy!

This year's birthday was the most uneventful, yet most well wishes one for me. What a way to start my last 20s before heading into that dreaded 30. Haha!

Really thanks lots for all the well wishes from everyone! Makes my heart feels fuzzy and warm inside, heh. This year I won't be celebrating or what, but I'll be meeting you guys one by one, and then we'll have a nice catch up session.

If you are happy, everyday's a celebration isn't it?

Love you guys!


DDOJ:

Short Birthday Jokes!

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.

A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip!

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.

Grandma, is it exciting being 99?
It certainly is! If I wasn't 99 I'd be dead.

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

Q: Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake?
A: Because it's too hard to put them on the bottom!

Q: How can you tell that you're getting old?
A: You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!

Adios!

12th Jan Warm

Congratulations for all the people who successfully passed O levels and is moving on to the next stage of their lives. You couldn't have done it if you didn't insist on working hard all the way, and for that, it is commendable!

The usual crap I will post at the end of this O levels.

When you are choosing what to enter for, please keep this in mind.

Don't choose the school, CHOOSE THE COURSE.

Don't ever listen to cock and bull stories about what and what school is not good, what and what school's cert is not recognized. If you are not convinced, just ask me your concern, I will show you with proof that what you are thinking about is entirely wrong.

I don't want you to regret choosing a course that you will hate taking. Thus, keep this concept in mind. Nobody in the future will care about what school you came from, they will only be concern with whether you have the right diploma or experience to take the job. Any employers who reject applications due to their school being "not so good", is a dumb employer. You are better off not working for such idiots.

You guys have until Friday to decide. Don't waste your time, and think hard about what you want to do. Don't enter poly for the sake of entering. This is my last advice to you as your tutor.


As for the few who didn't manage to hit the marks needed, you have to make your decisions known soon. Call me if you need advice, I'm always available.

As for some special note for a few of you.

Wee Tat: Your decision to stay and take O levels again did not fail you. It is because you worked for it and you made it.

Leon: Your decision to stay too, has made it.

I'm glad both of you persevere and made it through, I'm especially proud of both of you.


Congratulations once again, I'm glad and thankful for the memories you all have given me (as well as money muahaha) in the year 2009 and before. I won't forget every single one of you, just like your seniors.

Yet another year has come. We will now part as tutor and students, I'm proud to call you all now, my precious friends.


P.S. I love you guys.

31st Dec 2009

Last day of 2009, marking the end of the first decade of the new millennium. I think whoever is up there, I don't know who, but thanks for the peaceful decade. Time to enter the 2nd decade.

It was nice to see most of you back at the Chalet, and I was busy with everyone coming. I'm sorry if I didn't manage to spend enough time to chat, I really wanted to catch up with each and every one of you. Time is so short though!

Next year I will try to book 1 week, and then I'll allocate days for each batch of you to come, then you won't feel awkward, and I'll have lots more time to chat with all of you! Planning in progress =)

It's a whole new year, I thank all of you for all the good times we've been through, and the fun, laughter, tears, happiness, sadness, and everything. We all became stronger no doubt. See you guys in the new decade, love you guys!

Wishing you all, a happy new year 2010!


DDOJ:

Dear mum,

I am writing you this note to say that I haven't been honest to you lately.

I have a boyfriend, his name is Dragon and he lives in a trailer in the woods he wears biker clothes and deals Ecstasy.

I am moving in with him and I am four months pregnant.

His friends will come over all the time so I can get a little frisky with them.

We will make a living out of growing drugs and selling them to Dragons friends as are both already drug addicts, we will live a life of drugs beer and all the sex.


Wish us luck
Katie

P.S.
I am at the neighbors house, all of the above was a lie I just wanted to let you know there are worse things in life than my report card which is in the top drawer.

Adios!

17th Dec Suspense

Tomorrow is the big day for N levels.

Same old shit, so I'll cut the crap.

Believe in yourself, get your results with a calm mind and don't make rash decisions. If you are unsure of what to do, you have my number. Just don't make rash decisions yea.

Anyway I believe POA results for Ns this year should be good.
Good luck you guys, I wish you all the best!


DDOJ:

A guy walks in for his interview.
The interviewer asks, "Whats the first thing you notice about me?"

The guy responds, "Why, You don't have any ears."

Interviewer: "Get out! Send in the next guy."

2nd guy walks in for his interview.

The interviewer asks, "Whats the first thing you notice about me?"

The guy responds, "Why, You don't have any ears."

Interviewer: "Get out! Send in the next guy."

This guy on the way out says to the 3rd guy "What ever you do, don't say anything about his not having any ears - He'll kick you right out."

3rd guy walks in for his interview.

The interviewer asks, "Whats the first thing you notice about me?"

The guy looks at the interviewer intently for a few seconds and responds, "Why, you wear contact lenses don't you."

The interviewer says, "That's impressive that you're so observant. How could you tell I wear contact lenses?"

3rd guy "Because you don't have any damn ears to hang glasses on."

Adios!

6th Dec Windy

After 2 weeks of reservists, I've finally came back to civilization. That was 1 helluva 2 weeks, and to think I need to go through that again 8 more times. The very thoughts sends freezing chills down my spine.

Done some productive thinking and sorting out of thoughts while I was in camp.

I found that this year I've been writing too much words of advice to people in this blog, I'm beginning to sound like a nag already. I think I rather enjoy that, nagging is fun, you guys should try it sometimes. It's pretty fun at the expense of the ears of people around you. Fun times I tell you!

Classes will begin soon now that we've reached December. New year, new batches, new faces, new students, new slackers, new nagging, new new new!!!

Anyway to a friend of mine, you may not be reading this but in the event that you do, please put your weird way of thinking away and keep it in a dusty corner of your brain capacity. Take note not to take it out again, if in the event that you do, please chuck it right back again.

Your life isn't just yours, you have others dependent on you.
If you don't save yourself, nobody else can.


DDOJ:

A professer from the Washington State University was doing a test on children, so he brought in a bunch of first graders then he gave each of them a lifesaver all the kids got the same colour at the same time.

Red=Cherry
Green=Lime
Orange=Orange
Yellow=Lemon

Then he gave them all a honey flavored one after a while all the children couldn't figure it out so the professer gives them a hint "This is something your mommy might call your daddie"

Then one little girl looked at the professer and the other children in horror then she yells "Spit them out! Those are assholes!"

Adios!