2nd May Warm

In order to make myself functional most of the time during the day, I took the drastic step to consume coffee once again. It was pretty successful most of the day, except that I became an alert zombie.

What's worse is that the caffeine is still in me now at 1.10a.m in the morning, despite being exhausted, my mind's still active. I need to wash it away with some other liquid, and I'm trying my best to drink other stuffs. I hope it works soon, or I'll be going through the same shit again tomorrow when I wake up.

Things keep going through my mind, good things and bad things. Caffeine really disallow me to cool down my mind. I think it's pretty much a forbidden drug, and I totally don't like the side effects. Although I can stay alert for the lessons when I need to, my body is heating up like an oven. One more consecutive day with caffeine, I'll be falling sick really soon.


DDOJ:

In a tiny village on the Irish coast lived an old lady, a virgin and very proud of it. Sensing that her final days were rapidly approaching, and desiring to make sure everything was in proper order when she dies, she went to the town's undertaker (who also happened to be the local postal clerk) to make the proper "final" arrangements.

As a last wish, she informed the undertaker that she wanted the following inscription engraved on her tombstone: "BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED AS A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN"

Not long after, the old maid died peacefully. A few days after the funeral, as the undertaker/postal clerk went to prepare the tombstone that the lady had requested, it became quite apparent that the tombstone that she had selected was much too small for the wording that she had chosen. He thought long and hard about how he could fulfill the old maid's final request, considering the very limited space available on the small piece of stone.

For days, he agonized over the dilemma. But finally his experience as a postal worker allowed him to come up with what he thought was the appropriate solution to the problem. The virgin's tombstone was finally completed and duly engraved, and it read as follows:

"RETURNED UNOPENED"

Adios!

1st May Sunny

Ohaiyo gozaimasu !!!

It's saturday morning, labour day!

I had an hour of sleep only!

I drank a cup of coffee, and I'm damn high now, probably for the next 8 hrs!

Before I suffer from the full effects of caffeine, I would like to say... the Sun is so warm, the day is so bright, birds are chirping, trees are ruffling, lovely students are coming in for lessons!

Let me prepay the sentences later when I'm under going caffeine withdrawal... the Sun is freaking irritating shining into my room, the day is TOO bright still, birds are too noisy, trees are even noisier, lovely students are killing what's left of my active brain cells!


DDOJ:

A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.

The Blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed.
He points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.

The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the Blonde mortician a blank check and says, "I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing."

The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly.

She says to the mortician, "Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful.

How much did you spend?" To her astonishment, the blonde mortician presents her with the blank check. "There's no charge," she says.

"No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!" she says. "Honestly, ma'am," the blonde says, "it cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice."

"So I just switched the heads."

Adios!

21st Apr Cloudy

For the first time in many years, I haven't had the experience of insomnia because of nothing for a long time. I laid on my bed, and I totally pulled off a perfect 4 hours rolling on the bed trying to fall asleep. Last straw came, I sat up and now I'm updating blogs.

I'm a totally caffeine intolerant person, the slightest caffeine can keep my eyes open as though I had my eyes forced open by toothpicks. Ironically, I had the same effect tonight without caffeine. That sucks!

Recently happen to chance across the show Glee, and I think it's pretty entertaining. A drama series that's half musical, and half drama, without the tinge of High School Musical in it. I felt that was fantastic, definitely worth my time watching it! If you guys had the chance to watch, do give it a try, you might like it too!

Drove around abit tonight, sent some DVDs to friends, and then I'm on my way back. Realized that I haven't gotten dinner till 10.30, but just again the fact dawned on me that it's hard to find people to eat with that late. Leading a 24/7 teaching life is kinda sacrificing on my meal and sleep timings.


DDOJ:

One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws.

At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his.

Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.

The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test.

The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the Designated Decoy."

Adios!

13th Apr Rainy

Still don't update, I'll be getting shot at for a dead blog!

It's been a rainy past month, and everything's going pretty well at the moment. Except that I didn't manage to motivate my current batch enough to make them work harder. Sometimes I wonder whether I am too slack with them, maybe I should just be a wacko and be really harsh with them. This year, most of the graduating groups which started fresh this year, didn't manage to catch up to syllabus before Mid-year, I don't know what happened.

Anyway, something happy happened.

Deyi Band has earned their 2nd consecutive wins in SYF for 2010 with 3 golds since the victory in 2008. I'm glad I kept my promise to be there, I witness a very sensational performance. It's very different watching it live with people you know, then to watch it on Youtube.

I would say I can feel the teamwork, the hardship they put in. I think it's all bearing fruit already, and they tasted their first sweet taste of victory first hand. Good job! Like I said, I was only there to watch the winners, and I did.



This is the video of their performance, and I'm very proud to share this with everyone. Witness their hardwork, and their perseverance. To me, they are the champions no matter what the result was.


DDOJ:

A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,....

"Rest in Peace."

The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.

After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied, "Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this: somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying,... 'Congratulations on your new location!'

Adios!

12th Mar Warm

Everybody's been talking about Tiger Woods, and Jack Neo. So I guess maybe this post, I could post something about it too! Kaypoh ma...

You guys actually think, that what happened was really worth that kind of media effort? I don't know about you, but I think everyone needs to open their eyes to see the real world. Like... Hello... this is how the real world is, welcome to the real world.

It's real and it's happening everywhere, people who are unfaithful to their spouse. You may not like it, but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Hell.. I absolutely hate starving, but I still starve myself silly when I don't have time in between lessons to eat!

If maybe some random people out there is unfaithful to his wife, do you think there is a need for him to make a public apology? Just because they are Tiger Woods and Jack Neo, that doesn't mean shit. It's basically just an ugly side of life, which is fully blown into paparazzi material.

My advice? Learn from others' mistakes. You don't have to bear the consequences, but you can learn as well. If you know something is wrong, then just don't do it, silly.


Anyway, I had a good rest today, so many people didn't turn up due to "marathon". Sometimes I wonder if it's more taxing on the body, or the mind. It's definitely taxing on my pocket though!

Ohya Chris, you and your "finger movement" thingy is spreading like crazy! I'm seriously considering asking you to make a short video of it and post it on Facebook, THAT WOULD BE COOL BEANZ!


DDOJ:

One Sunday morning George burst into the living room and said, "Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan. After dinner, George's dad took him aside, "Son, I have to talk with you. Look at your mother, George. She and I have been married 30 years, she's a wonderful wife and mother, but, she has never offered much excitement in the bedroom, so I used to fool around with women a lot."

"Susan is actually your half sister, and I'm afraid you can't marry her." George was brokenhearted.

After eight months he eventually started dating girls again. A year later he came home and very proudly announced, "Diane said yes! We're getting married in June." Again his father insisted on another private conversation and broke the sad news. "Diane is your half sister too, George.

"I'm awfully sorry about this." George was livid! He finally decided to go to his mother with the news his father had shared.

"Dad has done so much harm. I guess I'm never going to get married," he complained. "Every time I fall in love, Dad tells me the girl is my half sister."

"Hee hee," his mother chuckled, shaking her head, "Don't pay any attention to what he says. He's not really your father."

Adios!

5th Mar Sunny

It's been a weird weird fun day.

Firstly, it was Lee Keng's birthday, so her group met up at Hub. We ate and had lots of fun chatting, then while going back, saw a whole bunch of others too! Well, happy birthday Keng!

Then subsequently at night, a bunch of sillies called me to tell me something emotional. Although it sounded as if it was their last words, but it was a moment of emo which I think I can accept, for just tonight, heh. Alright alright.. love you too!

Treasure the ones who are always around you, even if they might sound silly, or sound ridiculous, or make you angry most of the time. In the end, people who are close to you, will always be close to you. It's just a matter of time whether you admit that fact, or you realize it when you lose it.

So don't be a klutz and think the whole world owes us, they don't. We lead our own lives, so we should live life to the fullest!!!


DDOJ:

Frog Psychic Hotline

Recently, the Psychic Hotline have launched a hotline for frogs. Here is a story of a frog and his discussion with the psychic.

A frog phones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog asks, "This is great! Will I see her at a party, or what?"

"No." says the Psychic.

"Next semester in her biology class."

Adios!

24th Feb Warm

Haven't been posting for a long time, and some are already bitching at me to start, heh. I don't post VERY interesting posts, but I guess I have some long overdue ones to share.

Year 2010, I seem to have quite some interesting bunch of students, here are some to share.

1. Theres this guy, who spam my biscuits all the time, and after gorging himself full with the biscuits... he would SLAP his tummy and heave sighs of content!! Imagine THAT !

2. Then theres this girl, who are just as crazy about animes and mangas as I used to, or rather, a bunch of them who idolize MJ!! And yet about 2 years ago, I thought my kind was an extinct one. Now you see them sprouting out from nowhere.

3. Following the cartoon "Bananas in Pajamas" which has B1 and B2, I have a cute girl who makes me G2 and shes G1.

4. Then there's this girl, whom I just can't resist.......... throwing paper balls at her!

5. Following Arun, theres now another guy who is even taller than him, 1.93m ! I know who to ask to change my room's lightbulb now.

6. A little chilli girl who always bullies me in lessons, although I admit I simply love to piss her off sometimes, but we do get good laughs! (sounds like you, Jocelyn Sim!)

7. Gabryel from St. Gabriel, I'm still waiting for a Teck Ghee from Deyi, Anderson from Anderson, or maybe Nicholas from St. Nicholas, which is IMPOSSIBLE

8. A little girl, who loves to wear oversize stuffs on her, specs, watches etc!


And the list goes on, I have wonderful and interesting students, I guess I'm gonna have a good year ahead of me! I guess I'm blessed (fingers crossed).


DDOJ:

A secondary school teacher arrived late for class to find a most uncomplimentary drawing of himself on the whiteboard. Fuming, he asked the class, “Who is responsible for this atrocity?!”

The class clown won tremendous prestige among his peers by answering, “I really don’t know, but I strongly suspect his parents.”

Adios!